Ebay Customer Service

The only thing I have altered in this exchange is my thick-fingered spelling. All of the rest of it is depressingly true. If you want to know why Bradley Manning et al are pilloried for telling the truth it’s not ‘national security’ that’s to blame. It’s the 1984 don’t-argue-it-won’t-make-any-difference culture that’s been sucked up and embraced wholesale. Was this the point of mass education? Please someone tell me it wasn’t.



Kieran Sears 20:48:24
Hello and welcome to eBay Live Help, my name is Kieran. How may I assist you?

yoxfordcafedeli 20:49:58
Hello, I wanted to bid on some cutlery. Ebay is insisting it does not know how old I am .

yoxfordcafedeli 20:50:16
and wants age verification by credit card. I do not possess a credit card.

Ebay demands age verification if you want to buy a knife. Including a knife and fork. But obviously, not all the time. Only when eBay feels like it. But anyway, let’s go with that for the moment.

yoxfordcafedeli 20:50:52
I do not believe in credit cards. I tried to give my VISA debit card details but Ebay claims it cannot recognise the card number.

Kieran Sears 20:53:25
Thank you for sharing your query. In this case you can use any other credit card, if your family members have it or a friends, if they are with you.

Any credit card other than the one I said I didn’t have, obviously.

Kieran Sears 20:55:01
If you have no access od Credit cards at all, in tha case, you can contact the seller and then ask them to provide you with any alternate payment method, so that you are able to pay for the item , however as perebay policies on UK, you have to put a Credit Card on file for the age verification, to bid or purchase a cutlery item

yoxfordcafedeli 20:56:43
So I can’t bid on it.

(And let’s ignore the fact eBay already has my age on file from other transactions in the past. But presumably they would pretend “Data Protection” wouldn’t let them use that information again, in more made-upness).
yoxfordcafedeli 20:57:13
Because Ebay demands I have a credit card.

Kieran Sears 20:57:36
If you can use any other credit card then you can bid any family members debit card will do

Kieran Sears 20:58:08
Ebay in accordance with policies of UK, in many other countries there is no such policy, an example can be Germany

yoxfordcafedeli 20:58:44
WHAT policy in the UK demands that I have a credit card, exactly?

yoxfordcafedeli 20:59:02
There is NO such policy.

yoxfordcafedeli 20:59:07
Except Ebay’s own.

yoxfordcafedeli 21:00:12
Let me get this right. You have just said I can use ‘any family member’s credit card.” You said this, not me. HOW will that verify MY age?

Kieran Sears 21:00:45
The system , will accept it , as it had happened with our members

yoxfordcafedeli 21:01:41
That does not answer my question. How will using someone else’s credit card verify my age?

Kieran Sears 21:04:05
This will, we give this workaround to our members so as to facilitate the buying , when it works then our members are able to purchase the cutlery items, there is no logic to it

yoxfordcafedeli 21:05:32
So why does Ebay have this policy?

Kieran Sears 21:06:30
eBay as per the norms of UK (under their influence) have this policy, let me give you a link of the same ‘

Kieran Sears 21:06:41
Pushing Url: http://pages.ebay.co.uk/help/policies/firearms-weapons-knives.html

Kieran Sears [Push Page] http://pages.ebay.co.uk/help/policies/firearms-weapons-knives.html21:06:41

yoxfordcafedeli 21:07:27
No, I know Ebay has this policy. I asked why.

Kieran Sears 21:07:58
Carl, I request you to please try by ading other Credit Card, discussing about the policy wont help here, if you have to purchase the item, then you can wirk on this solution, wont it be good to be able to purchase the item

yoxfordcafedeli 21:11:46
Yes it would, if I could bid on a cutlery set so I could eat my dinner without being made to go and get someone else’s credit card. Ebay’s idea of customer service is a joke. I asked a simple question. You can’t give me the answer and instead say discussing it won’t do any good. I am not discussing anything. I asked what law says I have to have a credit card and you just talk about ‘the norms of the UK’ which is totally meaningless. You then suggest I can validate my age by using someone else’s card and when I ask how that validates it you can’t answer that either. I am really looking forward to the email transcript of this. It will make a brilliant blog post.

The chat session is being wrapped up.

The chat session has ended.

This chat was on 01/10/2014. All times in the above transcript are in the following time zone: (GMT) Greenwich Mean Time : Dublin, Edinburgh, Lisbon, London


Kieran speaks an interesting version of English. It’s almost as if his name is totally made-up and fictional. So now you know. Verification is meaningless. Debate is useless. Questions are an irrelevance. Make-up a rule and call it the law and pretend it’s totally normal, inevitable and inescapable. Above all, don’t argue. Resistance is useless.

In the year when we’re about to celebrate millions of people being killed for ‘freedom,’ this is the kind of freedom we’ve embraced. The freedom to do exactly what we’re told. Oh brave new world.

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